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Is it possible some people do not know how to give a proper compliment? Or even worse, are there people who never give compliments?
My two darling daughters know how to compliment me so well. “Mom your hair looks perfect!” and my favorite from my baby girl ” Awww you look so pretty today Mamma!” Their compliments always take me by surprise and make me feel so happy. Of course, they can turn off the charm just as efficiently: “MOM stop shopping in the Junior Department!” “Ma, those jeans make your butt look big!” Or as I call them: the classic anti-compliment! But, as long as it is delivered from a place of love I can accept it. Yesterday, I received what I classify as a compliment gone wrong. Standing at the check out counter at a shop I often frequent I hear: “you look good today” from the cashier. I peered at her from under my huge sunglasses and shake my head denying her compliment and she reiterates once again: “No! You look good today!” All my brain is thinking is: “gee I must look really terrible on most days” but of course that is not how she meant it. (I hope!) So I got to thinking about how words really do have power and how sensitive we all are to compliments. I bet you can still recall some of the best compliments you have received. As women we do expect them when we have made “the effort” as I am fond of calling it. If I take the time to do my hair, makeup, nails, outfit etc he had darn well better take note eh? Some men are experts at this and others fail miserably….but I bet we all can fondly remember the ones who were lavish with compliments. Of particular interest is the compliment from a friend who is happy if you look good… just do not look better than her….then you will often get criticism as way of punishment for looking too good! Women are funny like that. We are all secretly competitive with each other.
My husband does compliment me nicely before we go out. But like I said: I made the effort! “Fine food takes time to prepare” as some menu’s have pointed out…just in case you are too ignorant to realize that fact we -will -spell- it- out. If I take too long getting ready for Date Night I gently remind my spouse of that menu slogan. I am, after all, fine food!
How to deliver a good compliment? Keep it sincere and genuine.
If you are new to this world keep is simple. Start small: “Your manicure looks great!” “What a pretty ring!” As you become braver work up to:”Beautiful hair!”
Be specific: “that shade of blue is great on you” “Your hair is so shiny” “OMG your waist looks so tiny in that dress” “Pilates is agreeing with you” “fabulous shoes”
And you can never go wrong with the flat out over the top enthusiastic “Gorgeous!” as long as you are genuine and sincere.
What about people who have never once uttered a kind compliment ever? We all know one! It is strange because when you do compliment them they soak it up, but they never return a compliment. My theory is that the people most likely to give compliments are the people who are the most secure, and the happiest with themselves. They have a lot of love to give and they enjoy spreading the cheer. So get out there today and give a compliment and see how pleasantly surprised you may be at the response. Most of us go into denial mode like I did yesterday but that is not a good trait either. Accept the nicety with a gracious response and try not to go into self deprecating mode. “It is better to give than receive” may be true of compliments my friends….and by the way you look STUNNING in that outfit!

Healthygirl

It was an ordinary day on Chicken~Pom~Farm…our cozy home where we have fit more animals, plants, and water features than we all thought possible. Sitting on the deck with our three Pomeranians enjoying a dull moment is a favorite pastime here. UNTIL I heard lots of splashing down in the koi pond!
what could that racked be? I thought. Perhaps one of our larger koi has snapped up a bug? Then I heard a high pitched chirp like cry…it was a strange, sad sound and it definitely got me to bolt up from my chair. What I saw next was so bizzare, so weird, that I couldn’t believe my eyes. There in the pond was Froggy, our small bullfrog with a bird in its mouth! What in the world? Poor Birdie, bad Froggy! I was too late to help. Froggy was ambitiously attempting to swallow this young sparrow but not…

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It was an ordinary day on Chicken~Pom~Farm…our cozy home where we have fit more animals, plants, and water features than we all thought possible. Sitting on the deck with our three Pomeranians enjoying a dull moment is a favorite pastime here. UNTIL I heard lots of splashing down in the koi pond!
what could that racked be? I thought. Perhaps one of our larger koi has snapped up a bug? Then I heard a high pitched chirp like cry…it was a strange, sad sound and it definitely got me to bolt up from my chair. What I saw next was so bizzare, so weird, that I couldn’t believe my eyes. There in the pond was Froggy, our small bullfrog with a bird in its mouth! What in the world? Poor Birdie, bad Froggy! I was too late to help. Froggy was ambitiously attempting to swallow this young sparrow but not having any luck. He finally gave up and I was able to fish the bird out of the pond with a rake. The koi were whipped into a frenzy and trying to eat it too. I mistakenly assumed koi were not carnivorous since they do not eat their young like some fish do….but they do eat bugs: protein: so they are carnivores. I guess they are higher up the spiritual ladder than frogs. At least our frog anyway! The birds often come to drink from the pond, in their innocence thinking it was a safe watering hole. But now that we have a killer frog in residence I fear for the winged ones safety!
Nature teaches us harsh lessons. I am imagining the Mother sparrow looking for her fledgling all day. Or worse, maybe they know what happened. Then we have the question of the motives of Froggy. Did he think Birdie was a large dragonfly perhaps? Not knowing he has bit off more than he can chew? Or in this case, swallow whole? One thing I know is that I will never know. Life is a mystery. Nature is nature. Little Birdie isn’t coming back and Froggy is a killer. Yet somehow we all manage to co-exist. Lesson learned on Chicken~Pom~Farm today: Don’t bite off more than you can chew!

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Try this simple and delicious dairy free soup. The plain almond milk has only 30 calories a cup – these are my ingredients:

2.5 cups almond milk

one head organic cauliflower

one chopped onion

2 cups chopped mushrooms

TBSP or so of olive oil

sea salt, cracked pepper, onion or garlic powder to taste

Cook cauliflower ( with spices) in almond milk until softened then use your deep emersion blender to blend it well

Sautee onions and mushrooms in olive oil in separate pan

Combine it  all together and cook additional 10-15 minutesImage 6Image 9Image 7

Image 2Finally got all my ingredients to make my first ever batch of FIRE CIDER!  So excited! The horseradish root was the only challenge: 1. to FIND (surprisingly found it at Shaw’s in Hyannis next to ginger root) and 2. to GRATE….at first I thought it smelled so divine and then, I could not believe how powerful it was! My eyes just burned, burned, burned, like a disco inferno…Image 1  I actually had to grate it with my eyes closed…The rest of the ingredients seemed easy after that horseradish root! So here is the recipe:

1/2 cup grated horseradish root

1/2 cup grated ginger root

10 (i used more) cloves of garlic smashed and or diced (I did some of each)

1 Onion chopped

1 jalapeño pepper OR 1/4 tsp cayenne

1 TBSP tumeric

1 zest and juice of lemon

Cover ingredients with Organic Apple Cider Vinegar ( I used Bragg’s)

Set in cupboard or refrigerator of ONE MONTH ( I put in fridge) SHAKE IT EVERY DAY TO MIX  then take out after a month and strain it through a fine sieve and or cheesecloth. ADD 1/2 cup of local honey to the strained cider and enjoy a shot every day or mix into salad dressing! Super anti viral anti bacterial remedy! A real boost for the immune system and it tastes amazing! Try it soon.Let me know how you enjoy it. What a terrific Christmas gift this would make for your family and friends next year! I read that some folks bury the jar in the ground for a month! Interesting, but I can just imagine me forgetting exactly where I put it or having the chickens or Pomeranians on Chicken~Pom~Farm dig it up on me!

Fire Cider!

Today I made the Fire Cider

I detest de-decorating from Christmas!.

ImagePink Hair Tape

Pinkie saves the day

Lately I have been obsessed with finding pink hair tape. It used to be in all the drugstores back in the 70’s. I have fond memories of being a kid and using scotch tape on my unruly bangs because I had no pink hair tape. We all wanted hair like Twiggy, Jean Shrimpton, and Mary ann Faithful. Those bangs  had to behave!  So instead of going the easy route: Amazon, I was determined to find the hair tape in a local store. No drug stores carry it anymore but all the clerks  seemed to recall it with fondness. Sigh. Happy memories. To me, being a true shopaholic, the thrill of the hunt is in walking into a store with nothing  and walking out of a store with your treasure in hand. Thus my thrill of finding the pink hair tape at Sally Beauty Supply in Hyannis.

Maybe I am just feeling nostalgic, or maybe it’s my new shorter haircut that has pushed me back in time to rediscover pink hair tape.  Every morning my bangs look like a kitten has slept on them! Oh yeah, one did! My new kitty Willow has taken to sleeping on my head. That combined with my fervent use of an eye mask has wrecked havoc on my new “petite fringe” as the hairdresser in Paris called my bangs once. The best thing about the hair tape (besides the fact that it really works) is that you can also use it in your wrinkles! A sort of $5.00 Botox treatment! Does it work like Botox? Of course not! But I bet if I started using it between my eyes every night when I was 19 years old it would have helped prevent my lines!                                           I had fun putting the tape on my face anyway…especially pulling the eyebrows up, up UP like Mr. Spock! Has my husband seen my hair and face wound up in pink tape yet? Heck no! The secret to a happy marriage is in keeping a little bit of the mystery!

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Now I HATE my car that just four days ago I LOVED. No, I am not fickle. My car is just stupid! I admire people who drive old cars and take care of them, and don’t always need the latest and greatest new models…but I am not sure I am cool enough to have an old car anymore . My Mercedes is 13 years old, and drives like a dream ….that is until it became stupid. It all began on the 4th of July when I decided to finally have my “dull moment” and went to the beach. While waiting to pull into a prime parking spot my car stalled. Nothing is more embarrassing than to be sitting in a car that will not move. Two nice strong men pushed me to the side so I could call AAA for rescue. Oops, no cell phone! Dumb, dumb, dumb. Next I get to meet the ice cream truck driver who is dressed up as Captain America. “I like your outfit” I say, ” can I borrow your cell phone?”
Torture: sitting in my beach chair, beside my stupid car in the parking lot, baking in 90 degrees of Cape Cod humidity, just steps away from the beautiful ocean.
Scene 2: Husband arrives home, gets in car and STARTS IT! “Honey, you just are driving it wrong”
HUH? I immediately decide to not bake him any cookies.
Flash forward one week: in line at bank drive up window: car stalls..panic sets in…again. I decide to leave car and make deposit in bank so I have time to pray. I storm heaven: “Please God I am begging just let it start please!” It starts! Thank you Lord! I am driving past the bank into the next parking lot and BAM it stalls again! This time it will not restart ….ugh! My friend picks me up.
Scene 3: Husband arrives home, we drive down to see my abandoned car. He gets in, it STARTS!
“Honey” he dares to say, ” you are just driving it wrong, you don’t know how to drive this car”
HUH? Now I am thinking I may never, ever, bake him another cookie for as long as I live.
So an hour later I go try to start the car and it will not start. He gets in, thinking he can start it since clearly I just don’t know how to drive my car correctly …and thank you Jesus, it doesn’t start for him either! I glare at him in the most loving way……Now, the moment I was waiting for:
“Honey, I apologize, it wasn’t you, it was the car”
DUH!
I decide to bake him cookies again, someday.
The first day without the car was a nightmare for me. I felt trapped like a rat….could not go shopping ….next day, even worse, I am in such a nasty mood….I feel so isolated! Day three, my husband gets to run me around…this is kinda fun having a driver! I feel like a New York socialite: “James, I need to be at the Club tomorrow morning and we must leave the house at 10 am”
“Yes Ma’am …”
I will not tell you what else he said.
Day four: Being without the car is strangely liberating! Now I really don’t even want to go anywhere! The refrigerator has never been so empty. Husband is happy to order pizza every night. I forage in the garden and gather eggs from my chickens. Laundry is all done. Dogs are all bathed and groomed. Weird! Best of all, I have spent no money at all…not even online.
The mechanic made a house call but the part he brought didn’t work so I am still Car-less in Yarmouthport ….
Think I will go for a float in my pool before I summon James for a drive to Trader Joes.
There are two other cars sitting in our driveway but I refuse to drive them…..
They are my husbands sports cars and let’s face it, I could be at risk for “Driving It Wrong”
“James, I need to do some errands in town. Could you please bring the car around for me at 3?”
I could get used to this.
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Scrumptious Homemade Strawberry Ice Cream.